The 10 Most Powerful Things You Can Say to Your Kids
Effective conversation helps parents create lasting,
meaningful relationships with their kids. These 10 powerful statements can get
you started on your way.
1. I like you.
This is a different statement from "I love you." This
statement says, "I like who you are as a person." Use them both.
2. You're a fast learner.
Learning is natural. Young children are amazing at it. Learning
is play to them. What you say to them early influences how they relate to learning
later in life, when it can be more difficult or frustrating.
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3. Thank you.
Simple courtesies are a sign of respect. Social skills are
critical in life and the best training for tact and grace starts early.
4. How about we agree to...
This is about establishing a few basic agreements that set the
stage for how you work together within the family. Having agreements in place
helps avoid common issues and provides a framework within which to solve
problems when they do arise.
5. Tell me more.
This is a request for your children to share their thoughts,
feelings and ideas with you. It also involves learning to listen, which is
always a gift because it signals that you care.
6. Let's read.
Reading to your kids brings so many benefits. It helps them
build skills they need for success in life. It enriches your relationship and
instills a love of learning. And books provide a gateway to the world—people,
places and ideas.
7. We all make mistakes.
Problems happen. No one is perfect. Dealing with problems and
learning from mistakes are vital life skills. When you have a moment in which
you don't live up to your own standards, it's an opportunity to show your
children how to take responsibility for mistakes and move on. Kids can beat
themselves up over not meeting your expectations or not being perfect. Giving
each other a little room around this is a gift for both of you.
8. I'm sorry.
It's something you can learn to say. Better yet, learn to catch
yourself before saying something that might later require an apology.
9. What do you think?
Asking for input and giving kids a chance to be part of family
conversations lets them learn to exercise their decision-making skills and
begin to take responsibility for their choices. Expressing what you think and
asking for what you want are fundamental skills that will serve your children
throughout their lives.
10. Yes.
While I do think "no" is still a viable option at
times, too often parents are "a 'no' waiting to happen." If you
create a pattern of "yes" in your family, you'll find that
"no" doesn't need to be said as often as you think.
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