Truths About Being an Extroverted Parent, According to Experts
Having a soft spot for the spotlight and a knack for
drumming up conversation with just about anyone typically means one thing as
far as your personality is concerned: you're probably an extrovert. And while
being an introverted parent has many benefits, there are also tons of parenting
perks if you're cut from a loud and gregarious clothf.
Sophia Dembling, the author of Introverts in Love: The
Quiet Way to Happily Ever After, and Susan Krauss Whitbourne, a psychological
and brain sciences professor at the University of Massachusetts and author of
several books, including The Search For Fulfillment, weigh in on all the pros,
cons, and everything in between when it comes to extroverted parenting tactics.
They tend to be pretty laid-back.
As far as dealing with day-to-day problems, extroverts
generally know how to play it cool and usually don't dwell on things for too
long. "They're fun and easygoing," says Sophia. "They don't
overthink and things happen around them." There's something to be said for
tackling an issue head on — think: breaking curfew — rather than letting the
anger build up.
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They’re always down to do something.
Parents who consider themselves to be extroverted are
akin to the Energizer Bunny — they just keep going and going. And that means
they're generally always game to have a good time, whether it's trying
something new, like rock climbing, or heading up the PTA.
If that sounds like you, be prepared to field a ton of
activity requests, especially if your kiddo is also super outgoing and active.
"Extroverts are going to be the parent that's going to go sledding and
surfing with their children," says Dr. Whitbourne. "They're the ones
your kids will look for when they want to have a good time and get out of the
house."
They have a playful side.
Although it may be challenging for an extroverted parent
to fully understand their children's emotions at times, they can get in touch
with their silly side at the drop of a dime. "Extroverted parents are
going to find it easier to get into the silliness of actually being a
kid," explains Dr. Whitbourne.
So the next time your little guy needs a pick-me-up,
don't be afraid to crack a few jokes or get a little loud — sometimes a
distraction is exactly what the doctor ordered.
They may have a hard time understanding their kids if
they're more reserved.
As much as we want the best for our children, it's also
important to appreciate your differences personality-wise. "An extroverted
parent with an extroverted kid sounds like a party," says Sophia, but,
"an extroverted parent with an introverted kid might mean a lot of worried
prompting: 'Stop sitting alone in your room! Go play with friends!'" Try
to avoid getting too worked up over it.
Dr. Whitbourne says to be extra mindful of this if you
have an introvert on your hands: "It's important to respect what she
actually finds comfortable. It doesn't mean you can't push her out of her
comfort zone ever, having her takes dance lessons, but don't throw her into a
school production where she's going to have to stand up on the stage in front
of 100 people."
They're known for making a little noise.
You know that mum who seems to have boundless energy on
the sidelines? Well, she's probably an extrovert, and that means there's a
reason she never stops cheering. "Extroverts make a lot of noise and draw
attention to themselves, especially when there's more than one in a room,"
says Dr. Whitbourne. Oh, and don't be surprised if you're met with a lot of eye
rolls and comments along the lines of "Mum, you're so loud!"
Sometimes the truth hurts!
They’re usually considered to be "the fun
parent."
If you hear chatter from your kids' friends that you're
one of the cool parents, don't be surprised. Extroverts are known for being the
life of the party and have no problem touting that reputation.
"They have a lot of fun and are especially
attractive in social settings," says Dr. Whitbourne. "Extroverts like
laughing and are specifically more active. Think less reading, more going out
there and playing pick-up basketball or hanging out with other folks."
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